Hello,
It’s me again. It’s been a long while since I wrote you a letter. I took some big trips in the past weeks. May was also my birthday month, so I had to unplug and celebrate in my own way. I went to Croatia, took a hiking trip at the Plitvice, traveled to the US for a close friend’s wedding in Boston, and did a side trip at the Big Apple.
After these trips, I learned these six struggles about living and working as an expat, especially in the big, international cities like New York:
that mental health issues are quite common
While walking around on the streets and parks, I’ve heard people talking loudly. And I wondered, are they talking to someone on their phones or talking to themselves? Hard to tell. But in the big cities, dreams could be easily broken, and if you’re not careful, you’ll break yourself too.that everyone (large or small) is just trying to survive including a family of rats in the subway
During a catch-up with former colleagues, I got asked, “have you seen the “children” in the subways?
And I got curious because I saw almost no kids in the subway. And among those I saw, no one looked special. “Which children?,” I asked.
A colleague explained that they’re referring to rats that scurry to and fro in the subway. Obviously, calling them “children” is a hyperbole. Who knows, the rats might be big enough to make passengers notice. I haven’t seen them, but in a place as dirty as the subway, I don’t doubt that they exist. And perhaps like the rat character in the film Ratatouille, they’re also just trying to survive and to fulfill their dreams (of finding a block of cheese?).that living in apartment blocks, seeing only manmade skyscrapers can feel suffocating
In New York, I’ve looked up at the Chrysler, Empire State, Rockefeller, and other magnificent skyscrapers that make you imagine what it would be like to live or work in one. But here’s what a former colleague admitted to me, “seeing only concrete every day is unhealthy”.
I agree.that it’s hard to buy and own property (unless you have a fancy job in one of those large investment firms)
Buying and owning a property in New York is almost impossible unless you have enough cash, or that you’re ready to keep working until you could pay the mortgage (minimum of 10 years or more).
But isn’t it the same struggle in other cities?
Many people (including me) dream of owning a house and lot. But achieving this goal often leads to entrapment in the rat race. If you take a loan to buy property, you have to keep paying. And that makes it harder for you to leave your job, leave your current city, or even your country.that you can keep working hard and still get nowhere
In the big cities, you have many opportunities to build a career and make money. But the same opportunities can also make you lose money and your career.
The system is not always fair from the other side. Immigrant rules trap people into staying even in jobs they don’t like. If you don’t have a permanent resident card, your risk of losing a job is higher. Finding another job is also competitive especially if you need work visa sponsorship.
And even if you’ve worked twice as hard as other people to prove yourself, you can still end up getting passed over for promotions (simply because you’re not a local or you don’t speak the language well).that many people dream of leaving, but they can’t imagine suffering again from the fallout of corruption and political conflicts in their home countries
There’s no place like home. But what if the home you’re returning to is not as safe and peaceful as you expect it to be? That’s why people keep staying abroad. Keep grinding. Keep hustling.
But until when?
Before leaving my decade-old job at the end of 2024, I went through all of the above struggles, and especially #6. I wanted to return to the Philippines and stay there for some time. My mother got hospitalized. I wasn’t there. And I still had some unresolved issues with her. I had this sudden feeling that if I don’t return soon, it might be too late.
For the sake of family, I wanted to have that flexibility to return home whenever it’s needed. My job was not giving me that flexibility. That’s why I switched to freelancing in Belgium. But I also need consistent income. I need back-up sources of income in case I don’t get freelancing contracts in time. When I returned to the Philippines early in 2025, I went into rice trading, and I spent a lot of time in our franchised milk tea business.
In 2026, I’ve finally decided to not renew the franchise. And instead, I gave starting capital to my mother who’s now survived her health struggles. We’ve opened up a vegetable business back home (a remainder of our days selling veggies in the public market), and my mother’s keeping herself busy and happy with it. As her daughter, I’ve also resolved my conflicts with her during my last trip back home.
Looking back, it’s been more than a year now since that whirlwind ride of trying to start my own thing. I’ve got a long-term contract again since January. I’ve written and published my book “Survive and Thrive”. I can write at my own time and place. And I’m free to travel once a month.
I want to keep fulfilling my dreams, but not at the cost of people who matter to me. I’m not afraid of working hard but I also want to have my efforts lead me somewhere. I want to keep exploring and learning, and have the means and time to do so. My true meaning of freedom is both money and time freedom.
And it seems I’m not alone in wanting to achieve this. When I talked to my colleagues back in the US (mostly millennials like me), they all wanted the same thing. They can’t imagine working all the way to retirement age. They don’t want billions, but just enough to live a decent and simple life. They don’t want to just survive day by day, they also want to thrive—doing jobs they like but not at the cost of their health and sanity.
Is it too much ask?
I’ve shared this with you because I’m wondering if perhaps you’ve also started thinking about these questions:
How do I start a side income while employed in another country, without legal headaches?
Can I register a business in my home country while living in Belgium (or some other country)?
My money sits in a bank account doing nothing. What are my actual options?
Where does my tax residency actually stand right now?
Am I building toward something, or just covering expenses in a more expensive country?
I’ve asked myself those questions a while ago. And although I don’t have all the answers yet, I’ve tried to obtain the answers for myself. As one friend said, “it’s better that I failed trying, than not to have tried at all.”
These days, the rules of achieving financial freedom have certainly changed. But no one cared to explain what those new rules are. So, here’s me doing something to put some clarity into our wealth-building journeys.
In the coming weeks, I am putting together a coaching program called (tentatively) the Personal Finance Audit. It is designed specifically for expats and international workers who are past the survival stage and ready to be more intentional with their money.
Before I launch it, I want to hear from you. What is the one financial question you have been sitting on for too long?
Your answer will shape what this program covers. It will also help me make sure it actually solves the right problems, not the ones I assume you have.
Hit reply and tell me: what is your biggest financial challenge as an expat right now? One sentence is fine. Or write me an essay (like this one). I read everything and I reply.
PS. Have you bought a copy of “Survive and Thrive” and finished reading it? If yes, I would greatly appreciate if you could leave a review via Amazon. It means a lot when you do.
PPS. Tin here, your coach-guide. I help you gain money and time to be happy even as you live and work overseas. Thanks for being part of the “Survive and Thrive” newsletter community. If this newsletter has been forwarded to you, click survive to continue getting fresh insights and stories.